Sunday, October 4, 2015

October 4, 2015

Saturday was shimmering curtains of rain. Achievements included managing to program a new universal remote, after having told the clerk at Best Buy that it would never work for me.
Though I’d decided that try to sing outdoors in the unrelenting downpour was idiotic, I nevertheless appeared at City-County Plaza in time for the opening of Pride. Turns out that was well, for the other basses were no-shows. It was quite miserable, but not quite unbearable. At one point I was standing at the edge of a tarp when the tarp had filled up with rain, and dumped its load directly on my head. This occasioned much mirth, even on my part, once the shock passed away and I saw the faces convulsed with laughter around me. It was like a scene out of a movie. We actually sounded quite good, delighting the ten or twenty people who may have been listening. The Asheville High ROTC color guard raised the colors as we sang the National Anthem.  We sounded good.
Scudding gray clouds outside the tiny window.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

October 3, 2015

Crashed into the end of the week like a locomotive into a wall. You would have thought the heavens had rained all the rain they possibly could, but though the air is empty at this dim hour, more rain is forecast. A hurricane churns off the coast.
Went to see Lucia’s play at Magnetic last night. Struck by the fact that I knew no one in the audience (it used to be all “us,” a tightknit theatrical group) though I still knew everybody on stage. The audience was sparse, but, then, the weather was unspeakable. They had cider. Cooling my throat with cider, I thought that sitting in a theater waiting for the show to begin, drinking cider, was one of the best things in the world.    

Heaven rained me home.

October 2, 2015

Odd conviction sitting in the theater in Waynesville, hearing director’s notes after the rehearsal. The conviction was that I was going to be in an accident and die on the road on the way home. The weather was terrible, so it wasn’t completely implausible. I considered staying over in a motel for the night, but then thought, “Oh, hell, let’s get it over with.” The main emotion was disappointment that my last night should be so dreary and lusterless. The rain was heavy and the driving awful, but here I am.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

October 1, 2015

In an ethics argument with philosophers, you know you’re winning when they sink into philo-speak (“etiology,” “normative” etc). Undergraduates (who are not philosophy majors) talk of Philosophy as a smokescreen for bullshit, and I cannot from my experience with my peers contradict them.

Rough rehearsal last night. We may have lost Erin for good. Another woman is being groomed. Driving through cloudbursts– not my favorite thing. If I don’t stop to think I can get through most of my speeches. When I pause to correct or consider, then we leave the rails.

My first CafĂ© Americano. It is both bitter and weak– I hope that’s not a comment on “Americano.”

Distant hurricane. Rain. Petals falling on my floor from the fading roses.

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

September 30, 2015

Over yesterday’s disappointment at the speed of whirlwind. Why, I won’t even ask.

Expected rehearsal last night to be an awful groping for lines, but I was actually pretty good, by far the best of the lot. Dementia? Not yet. Waited for Erin at Earth Fare until the very last moment, told when I got to the theater that she had a family emergency in Atlanta.

Energy this AM. Feel like a boy.

Lovely rain.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

September 29, 2015

Immensities of rain. Start, stop, start again harder. It’s like Ireland.

Testimonies from my two boys on how great the playwriting workshop is.

Excellent class (I thought) on Crete, Mycenae, Archaic Greece. God knows what they thought.

Five minutes online reveal that Austin Macauley is primarily a vanity publisher, and when they send me a contract, it will likely be an “author contribution” one. They do real contracts, too, but the fact that this is all hidden, that there is nothing on its website to indicate it is a vanity publisher, raises the creepiness level to near infinity. At least one immediate task is off me; I won’t put In the Country of the Young through a full rewrite for them. Well played, Lord: full points for you. Maybe not full points: I hadn’t fallen for it quite completely– hence the online search. But a great victory nevertheless. Salut.

Monday, September 28, 2015

September 28, 2015

Crashed into bed last night at 9, having already fallen asleep on the couch twice. I need to put a limit on the number and intensity of things I do in a day. Left rehearsal early, the arthritis in my shoulder and upset in my stomach having become unbearable. I thought, “You’re singing. For a stupid concert. There’s nothing in the contract which requires you to be in physical agony.” The man next to me sounded sensational, so my old, vain worry that the basses would be lost without me seemed yet vainer. Went home, took the aspirin, lay down, essentially never got up again. Feel great this AM. Ran 1.25 miles on the elliptical, before dawn, studying my lines.
The Bs’ reception went well. All the baked goods, even the experiments, seemed to work, and I’ll blame over-preparation rather than taste for the fact that dozens were left over. The congregation may be eating them after church for the next six weeks. There were probably enough pieces for every person at the event to have ten. The event itself was remarkable– who knew there would be such richness in the repertory for trumpet and organ? Interesting music, layered and contemplative. J sang some of my Baroque favorites. I was happy just sitting and listening. Take-away: sit and listen more.
Preparing the manuscript for Austin Macauley. Ocean of typos. I make new ones correcting the old. I’m sometimes a better writer than I remember myself being.
Giving up my fight in the Humanities. Not giving up the principle, exactly, but noting that the front has moved, and there I stand alone in an empty field. I was right a year ago. Now– not so much.
Glowering sky. I inquired of the garden and it is finally satisfied with regard to the rain, though there still is a way to go before there is too much.